What is God trying to tell me?!?!?!

So this is the third time that I have read Matthew 5:29-30: "29If your right eye causes you to sin, gouge it out and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to be thrown into hell. 30And if your right hand causes you to sin, cut it off and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to go into hell." or Mark's version of this same version (Mark 9 42-48) this week alone.

I have a feeling God is really trying to tell me something. Perhaps he is trying to tell me to stop worrying and trying to perfect my outer image, and concentrate more on my intimate relationship with Him. He makes a point. As usual. :)

Plus, in my devotional today it talks about me constantly praying for the Lord to speak to me. In this day and age, the language of God is so misinterpreted that it is easy to get lost in translation. I always have a fear that perhaps I am not really hearing him, that I am just hearing nothing. Then as always, my devotional or my readings or even something that Drew or my father will say will be exactly the things that I was praying on. There is no denying that, especially when I get such obvious answers, without me even asking people directly.

To me, it is once again proof of how much God wants to be involved in my life. The more I try to involve him, the more he really involves himself in more obvious ways. I prayed for more ways to help people out in need, I got a phone call from somebody asking me to make a meal for somebody who just had a baby. I prayed for more open communication between myself and God, and the devotional that I haven't read in a while (I have a couple that I like) talks of me just praying and saying "Speak, Lord". I have fears of the unknown-- you know, the world ending, when I will die, will my baby live a full and happy life-- and my Bible reading that night says "Why are you still afraid?"

I cannot deny such power from God. He strikes fear in my heart as well as love, and I can only pray and try to humble myself to even remotely deserve to live in his Kingdom for eternity.